Bottom Five

Here is my list of least favorite patagonia items:

5. axuwool bedsheets -- warm in the winter, cool in the summer, but a little bristly on the skin.

4. expedition weight sandwich baggies -- soft and durable, but I just don't have much use for these.

3. silkweight oven mit -- I burned two fingers while I was using this p.o.s. luckily I had a full stock of patagonia R.2 micro puff band-aids.

2. R.5 sex ramp -- had good sex on it once and I can't get the stain out. Now when I bring a lady home and show her the R.5 sex ramp she gags and points at the stain. ruins the moment.

1. men's fleece condoms -- the fleece absorbs all the moisture up in there. makes sex feel like dry humping. and I don't need to do any more dry humping than I already do with my patagonia super spraymaster hump doll.